tn | Nudist Forum | Where do you look?

artemisia

Barefoot [31] | 11 months ago | More Info

#1

Female | Riverside, California United States | 63

<img src="null">Artemisia - Artist, Humanist <img src="http://cdn.image.truenudists.com/people/4jrs0/5583ff5e6fbf3e2b2d92712fc68765a5.jpg"><br

Where do you look?

When I was first introduced to social nudism (versus the nude lives we live behind our closed doors), I was totally unprepared for the interaction of others to my and their nudity. I know this is a question all new-to-nude-lifestyle folks have.... WHERE do you look and HOW do you keep from obviously LOOKING.

I'd be interested in other people's answers, and have this of my own to offer (now that I've been socially nude for 20+ years):

I've been trained in martial arts, and part of that training is to have "soft eyes", which means to see all, focus on nothing. So taking in a situation, it allows one to see the whole image, not just the parts. This has been enormously useful to prevent staring at someone (or some thing) that comes into view. The "soft eyes" looks generally at a person's right eye and diffuses the focus to allow peripheral vision to be as important as that eyeball. It is an amazingly useful way of "looking" without focusing.

What do you do?

AndyDi

Super Nudist [639] | 11 months ago | More Info

#2

Male | Temecula, California United States | 60

Loves being naked, plays well with others!

RE: Where do you look?

Honestly ... in the beginning ... my eyes were everywhere! But I do that with everyone ... even when I people watch at Disneyland. I tend to take in the entire person ... not just those parts that everyone is thinking about looking at. After a few trips to our nude beach ... honestly, you've seen one, you've seen them all. Both sexes have parts that are different in many ways but ... it really is all the same. It got easier and easier with each visit to a nudist venue and after the first couple of months ... we were "looking" for friends and you don't find friends by looking at their chests, butts or between their legs ... it's what's beneath their chest (heart) and between their ears (brain) that really matters. So ... I look into their eyes but find I try and focus on the face and not the eyes because it's too hard to focus on both eyes at the same time. LOL

jaybirds

Butt Naked [305] | 11 months ago | More Info

#3

Couple | Altadena, California United States | 58 & 58

RE: Where do you look?

I think most of us can admit, at least I can, that we still look when seeing someone for the first time, whether at a beach, park, resort, or party. It's just basic human nature. As far as I'm concerned, I dont think theres anything wrong with that, and I have no problem admitting it. Like AndyDi has stated, its a glance to take in the whole person, and not specific body parts. The problems begin when that quick glance devolves into intrusive and obnoxious staring. Most experienced naturists are acutely aware of this, and sensitive to it. As one of our friends, a rather self-admittedly "large" lady, quite often states, "The only time men talk to my face, instead of my chest, when we meet, is at a nudist resort or function!"

DesertRat

Super Nudist [984] | 11 months ago | More Info

#4

Couple | Phoenix, Arizona United States | 65 & 67

RE: Where do you look?

I can honestly say that I have no idea where I'm looking when talking to someone. To me it doesn't seem to matter where I look as long as I don't stare. I don't believe that any one, of either sex, has felt uncomfortable when speaking to me when we were both nude. When I am nude, in a nudist setting, and they are dressed and feeling a little uncomfortable, that's their problem, not mine.

AndyDi

Super Nudist [639] | 11 months ago | More Info

#5

Male | Temecula, California United States | 60

Loves being naked, plays well with others!

RE: Where do you look?

Here's a story that goes along these lines that I forgot about. We have these aquaintances/friends (only see them in passing at one of our favorite resorts) that we hadn't seen for a while. We happened to be visiting the resort at the same time, saw each other and got up from our lounges and met in the middle of the pool deck. We exchanged "hello's", began to catch up and about 15 mins into the conversation ... I notice three small but distinct scars on the female friend's abdomin. They looked just like mine and I said ... "hey, you had gall bladder surgery." She said ... "yes I did. How'd you know?" I pointed to her scars and then pointed to mine. Sometimes these conversations just end but because we had yet another thing in common, it led to spending the day together, had dinner together and then became more friends than aquaintances. Not because of the gall bladder surgery but it opened up the conversations to other topics and we could have talked all night.

ManOfWicklow

Ultra Nudist [6262] | 11 months ago | More Info

#6

Male | Nr Tamworth, But Originally From Leicester, Leicestershire United Kingdom | 62

A lie has speed, but truth has endurance.

RE: Where do you look?

I can honestly say that I have no idea where I'm looking when talking to someone. To me it doesn't seem to matter where I look as long as I don't stare. I don't believe that any one, of either sex, has felt uncomfortable when speaking to me when we were both nude. When I am nude, in a nudist setting, and they are dressed and feeling a little uncomfortable, that's their problem, not mine.

mako09

Topless [60] | 11 months ago | More Info

#7

Male | Arizona United States | 46

RE: Where do you look?

I will be honest and say it all depends on what or who I am looking at. I have looked at others intimate parts as they have obviously looked at mine, but the key is not to stare or make someone feel threatened or uncomfortable with you looking.

NakedBadger

Undies Only [202] | 11 months ago | More Info

#8

Male | West Chester, Pennsylvania United States | 62

Reading, writing, wearing agrin...

RE: Where do you look?

Wow - what an intriguing initial post to this thread. I was expecting the question to be "Where do you look for information?" or "Where do you look for directions?"

Then I read,

"I've been trained in martial arts, and part of that training is to have 'soft eyes', which means to see all, focus on nothing. So taking in a

situation, it allows one to see the whole image, not just the parts.

This has been enormously useful to prevent staring at someone (or some

thing) that comes into view. The 'soft eyes' looks generally at a

person's right eye and diffuses the focus to allow peripheral vision to

be as important as that eyeball. It is an amazingly useful way of 'looking' without focusing."

It strikes me that "soft eyes" is an amazingly useful concept ... I'll have to think about it for a while.

Thank you, Artimisia!

Badger

joewire

Topless [70] | 11 months ago | More Info

#9

Couple | TO, Ontario Canada | 48 & 43

RE: Where do you look?

I look people in the eyes. After you have played volleyball, gone to a dance, floated in the lake, had a campfire, etc etc you forget about the awkwardness and get to know people. Social nudity is a breath of fresh air to your psyche. It's like hitting a reset button on your personality. After you've gotten comfortable at looking at others you look at yourself.

NakedBadger

Undies Only [202] | 11 months ago | More Info

#10

Male | West Chester, Pennsylvania United States | 62

Reading, writing, wearing agrin...

RE: Where do you look?

I like this, too: one is more aware of one's self as one looks at others -- not an awkward, uncomfortable self-awareness, but a more conscious awareness of the other -- that looks at others in the eye, but also receives the look of the other. Well said!

Badger

Cheri_Donna

Ultra Nudist [4590] | 11 months ago | More Info

#11

Female | Hopkins, South Carolina United States | 65

Doing what I can to positively promote nudism.
http://www.travelites.info

RE: Where do you look?

I hope everyone looks at the face of the person with whom he/she is communicating. Even in the non-nudist world, that is the polite thing to do.

AndyDi

Super Nudist [639] | 11 months ago | More Info

#12

Male | Temecula, California United States | 60

Loves being naked, plays well with others!

RE: Where do you look?

But that's not reality or realistic. We ALL look, whether we are clothed or whether we are naked. It's human nature, it's part of who we are, we look at other people and we don't just look at people's faces or into their eyes. It's not being honest about who we are and what we do. We can't continue to lie to ourselves in order to try and stress to other nudists and non nudists that this lifestyle is SOOOO different than the lives we live when we have to wear clothes. How many times have you heard women say ... "I love her shoes!"? What the heck are these women doing looking at someone's feet? Do they have a foot fetish? If we use the idea that we ONLY look into someone's eyes, we DON'T look at everyone else's bodies ... we are not being honest with each other. ; )

SteveinKona

Butt Naked [363] | 11 months ago | More Info

#13

Male | Captain Cook, Hawaii United States | 63

RE: Where do you look?

Of course you'll see the whole body. If people were clothed, you would not be expected to interact without noticing their clothing; naked, you will notice their bodies. But if you are concerned about staring, then by all means return to the face.

AndyDi

Super Nudist [639] | 11 months ago | More Info

#14

Male | Temecula, California United States | 60

Loves being naked, plays well with others!

RE: Where do you look?

Staring and gawking goes without saying ... it's rude and inappropriate, whether naked or clothed. It's just that ... saying we don't look because we are nudists and we don't do those kinda things ... isn't truthful. We are curious by nature and we look. It's NOT a bad thing!

BitFlipperBob

Undies Only [223] | 11 months ago | More Info

#15

Male | Jersey City, New Jersey United States | 62

BobThe most difficult lesson to learn in life is to accept yourself as you are, to be you and stop acting like someone you are not.

RE: Where do you look?

I think doing a quick scan from feet to head is a primeval instinct. It is not just survival of the fittest, but also of the smartest. We are looking to see what weapons this other person may have or are their muscles bigger than yours. That is how we survived for thousands of years. In our current societies we have forgotten why but we still do it, like breathing. It is the start of body language.

Bob

openrange

Undies Only [190] | 11 months ago | More Info

#16

Couple | Ville, Pennsylvania United States | 53 & 43

RE: Where do you look?

i wear my sunglasses at night

so i can

so i can

keep all the visions in my head......

ok i'll admit a bad ha-ha but the song came to mind reading this one (-:

Slack-man

Topless [91] | 11 months ago | More Info

#17

Male | Alabama United States | 22

RE: Where do you look?

I have never meet a nudist face to face before Well bing nude and them being nude So i cant say for shear.
BUT i have webcam with them before So if they are pointing More towerds there face thats wear i notice.
IF they are pointing at other things and focasing that to the point wear you cant see anything els Well then that is what i see first lol. ( but then i just click off when i see stuff like that lol )
So i just look at wear the webcam is pointed at lol.

onenudistguy

Textile [2] | 11 months ago | More Info

#18

Male | Clarence, New York United States | 57

RE: Where do you look?

Recently I told my adult daughter I am a nudist. I didn't know what reaction to expect but the teasing started immediately. She asked if people look down on me for being a nudist. I replied "No, usually it's eye contact".

onenudistguy

Textile [2] | 11 months ago | More Info

#19

Male | Clarence, New York United States | 57

RE: Where do you look?

True. I've found it easier to recognize someone from a distance when they're nude after having seen them nude.

kramtrohs

Butt Naked [278] | 11 months ago | More Info

#20

Male | Perth, Western Australia Australia | 31

RE: Where do you look?

I generally look at people's faces!

Where do you look?

artemisia

#1

Where do you look?

AndyDi

#2

RE: Where do you look?

jaybirds

#3

RE: Where do you look?

DesertRat

#4

RE: Where do you look?

AndyDi

#5

RE: Where do you look?

ManOfWicklow

#6

RE: Where do you look?

mako09

#7

RE: Where do you look?

NakedBadger

#8

RE: Where do you look?

joewire

#9

RE: Where do you look?

NakedBadger

#10

RE: Where do you look?

Cheri_Donna

#11

RE: Where do you look?

AndyDi

#12

RE: Where do you look?

SteveinKona

#13

RE: Where do you look?

AndyDi

#14

RE: Where do you look?

BitFlipperBob

#15

RE: Where do you look?

openrange

#16

RE: Where do you look?

Slack-man

#17

RE: Where do you look?

onenudistguy

#18

RE: Where do you look?

onenudistguy

#19

RE: Where do you look?

kramtrohs

#20

RE: Where do you look?

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