Overheard in a bar.
Bartender "What's the matter, you look depressed."
Customer "I'm having trouble with my wife."
Bartender "What happened?"
Customer "She said she wasn't going to speak to me for 30 days."
Bartender "But that ought to make you happy."
Customer "It did, but today is the last day."
One day a man came home from work earlier than usual and
caught his wife in bed screwing his best friend.
Enraged, the husband grabbed a gun and shot his friend to death.
His wife said, "Ya' know, if you go on like this, you're going to lose ALL your friends."
I believe I like you DesertRat . . . somewhere today (and I don't remember where or what) you wrote something what struck a chord with me, and now these "words of wisdom" ;-) Johnny
Thank you Johnny. It's nice to know that you were responsible for making another person's day a little brighter.
*The Dog *
A man was leaving a convenience store with his morning coffee when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 50 Feet behind the first one. Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a dog on a leash. Behind him, a short distance back, were about 200 men walking single file.
The man couldn't stand the curiosity. He respectfully approached the man walking the dog and said, "I am so sorry for your loss, and this may be a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this. "Whose funeral is it?" "My wife's." ''What happened to her?" The man replied, "She yelled at me and my dog attacked and killed her."
He inquired further, "But who is in the second hearse?" The man answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog turned on her." A very poignant and touching moment of brotherhood and silence passed between the two men. "Can I borrow the dog?" The man replied, "Get in line."
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