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Porn gives young people an unrealistic and unhealthy idea of how quickly a plumber will come to your house.

Lol...good one

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Never in the history of calming down has anyone calmed down by being told to calm down.

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Sex before marriage is a sin, unless you do it doggy style, all dogs go to heaven.

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In my next life I am coming back with money and looks instead of all this sparkling personality bullshit.

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The hell with a nude picture, show me a picture of your medicine cabinet so l know what l'm dealing with.

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Her.. how long before l am able to have a normal sex life again doctor? Dr.. no one has ever asked me that after having their tonsils out.

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Ive got to go to the eye doctor, they better not tell me Ive got 20 20 vision....Ive seen enough of 2020 to know its not good.

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"He must have fell off an ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down."

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It's my wife's birthday tomorrow, she's been leaving jewelry catalogs all over the house, so I bought her a magazine rack.

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RE:Quote of the day

It's my wife's birthday tomorrow, she's been leaving jewelry catalogs all over the house, so I bought her a magazine rack.

And if you survive, for your birthday are you going to leave out copies of Penthouse and Playboy?

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