About men who gripe about nudist resort culture
I was reading a few posts here and there from men who have a "bone to pick" with nudist resort culture.
They range from "mild":
- "If nudist resorts don't adapt they will all eventually die."
To outright antagonistic:
- "Every clothing-optional resort I've ever visited was full of voyeurs leering at women" (to which I sarcastically replied: "well maybe you should get out of Florida sometimes." He didn't like that answer!)
- "Single men are not a problem; actually most nudist women I've known have been hit on by married men. Nudist resorts actually suck for women!"
I paraphrase of course but that's the general tone.
Whenever I see posts like the last two, I can't help but think there's some underlying anger about nudist resort culture. Maybe they're single men or married men who know they can't go without their wives. But I feel that spreading disinformation is unhelpful.
Personally, when my first wife and I separated, I knew the nudist resort was going to be "out of reach" for a while. I didn't even bother asking because I don't deal with rejection very well. So instead I decided to relocate. Florida was my first choice; but unable to find a job there, I decided on the Midwest, where I could go to Mazo Beach. As a matter of fact I went there the very first week end after moving. My "return" to the nudist resort scene only happened after I remarried.
I get that it's hard when social nudity seems out of reach because resorts might have quotas or not allow married males. But railing against nudist resorts? There are a lot of good things about the nudist resort. Sure it's a lot better if you have a partner by your side; but one's individual circumstances preventing visiting one does not seem to me to be a good reason to "put them on blast."
Ive seen these threads and posts as well and usually end up feeling a bit confused when reading them. I end up somewhat confused because it has not been my experience rather the opposite. However, I then remind myself that my experience is limited to many visits to Laguna Del Sol, a bit over a week at Cypress Cove, another week at Living Waters (sold and turned textile now), and eight different week to ten day trips to resorts in Jamaica. In other words my experience is pretty limited when it comes to landed resorts in the US. But I know my experiences have been very different from the postings, even so, I would not be surprised to find some places do have environments that can be negative. In the end it boils down to people making generalizations purporting that all resorts are bad instead of a specific subset of them.
We have also been mainly to the bigger resorts, at least in the US: Laguna del Sol, Cypress Cove, Lake Como, Sunny Rest, plus our local camps: Solair, Sun Ridge, and Berkshire Vista. We have also been to Abbots Glen b&b in VT which is set up like a small camp. Never had those experiences at any of those places either. Ive only been to one resort alone, Mountain Air Ranch, and still didnt have those experiences. It was on a Monday afternoon after a long cross country flight, so it was not very crowded. Nobody went out of their way to welcome me, but it was a Monday and I only stayed a few hours (way more relaxing after my flight than immediately driving down to Colorado Springs and going to my hotel). I suppose if I was expecting everyone to drop what they were doing to cater to me I would have thought it wasnt an experience that will keep them open for long. 5-6 years later and Im pretty sure MAR is still doing fine.
Social X (and that X isnt limited to nudity) is going to have a lot of couples. Why do you think there are social groups for singles? There are groups for singles in the nudist community, too. There are singles mixers on the nude cruises we go on, and there are singles events occasionally at different nudist resorts. It isnt a weekly thing, so be ready when they do occur. Or stay with the beaches.
the single guys that complain are part of a group that doesn't want rules on anything ,
when i was single , i knew the rules at nudist resorts and i didn't even try going there
once i was in a relationship again i/we started visiting them again
anyone with 1/2 a brain understands the need for the restrictions placed on single guys
nothing wrong with single guys wanting to be nude but when they show up in droves
any woman would get nervous and want to leave and not come back
and that helps no one !!
No one can generalize about nudist resorts. There are all kinds of nudist resorts that cater to a very wide variety of people. There was even an upscale so called nudist resort that was actually a swingers resort. This place was eventually thrown out from AANR.
I've also had no issues but also respected the rules/guidelines intended solely to assure comfort of the members (couples and women). That said, its not as much fun going solo unless you know people who are likely to be there.
I don't like to generalize but can share my experiences with three nudist resorts within a three hour drive of Chicago:
The first asked if I was a single male and told me he was probably closing his resort the next season. That was 25 years before he died and his resort closed with him.
The second resort I went to with a friend. The average age was 60+ and no one said hello or did anything more than give me the feeling I was tolerated but not welcome.
The third one I called as a dad asking if I was welcome to attend with my two grade school children. I was told we were welcome if I brought their birth certificates and a signed statement from their mother giving permission, with no consideration given to my parental rights.
I am left with the understanding that
Resorts on the coasts are better than the Midwest
I won't bother trying with any local resorts
Despite my good intentions, my teenage sons haven't been exposed to social nudity and don't have them on their radar.
My overall experience with local resorts has been negative, but I don't want to generalize this globally.
I can say for me, as a single guy I will avoid AANR clubs. My experience in the USA was as previously described, I was unwelcome, and they didnt try to hide it.
Europe, no one cares.
I live in Canada now and Im happy visiting a few places and minding the rules. I do know that there are a faction of folks there that want to purge all single men from being able to attend, regardless of their behaviour.
Im generally turned off by closed minded behaviour.
Ive found especially at AANR clubs and their member seem to have a naturism is only my way and if you dont like it youll be kicked out mentality. I avoid this.
Ive also been to clubs that have no intention of accepting new members, regardless of gender or marital status.
Naturism as a movement needs to be accepting, otherwise the movement will die and clubs will close.
So, in short, Ill never support AANR or attend any of their clubs.
This thread is proving my point that you cant generalize and say that all resorts are bad etc. Obviously from some these post there are some that are restrictive etc. But not all are. Ive been to Laguna Del Sol many times and probably 90-95% of those times Ive gone by myself as my wife does go but its not really her thing and shes usually got a lot going on. Ive never had the slightest problem going by myself. The first several times others that were there were not as open but I did meet people on my first visit and have seen them many times since. As I went more often Ive gotten to know a lot of the regulars and have been invited to pot lucks, an anniversary party, etc. I got to know people on my own and it was great being able to introduce my wife to them when she started going with me some of the time. When Living Waters was open I stayed there by myself fora week while my wife was out of the country and again had no issues and was invited by other guests to go into Palm Springs one evening for dinner and the street fair. So its not AANR or resorts in general, its each individual resort and their policies.
Being on the other side of the Atlantic Im looking at this discussion from a European perspective. There are no private nudist clubs in Ireland and ones I visited in the UK were always inclusive though some had couples nights etc. ( but thats just a snapshot from my own experiences ).
The world has changed a lot since all families were Dad ( earner ), Mum ( housewife ) and kids with even white teeth. Families come in a multiplicity of variations and younger heterosexual couples and their families generally wont want to be members of clubs where their LGBTQ+ or single friends and their families arent EQUALLY welcomed and celebrated.
Umbrella organisations such as the AANR and INF etc have a responsibility to take meaningful action to stamp out bigotry. and discrimination. Clubs or organisations should have to sign up to inclusivity and should be stripped of accreditation if they fail on that front.
The bigotry of the past is no longer acceptable. Men are not inferior, brutish beings who cant be trusted unless accompanied by a responsible female! And treating them as if they are is offensive and unacceptable! All people should be equally welcomed and celebrated regardless of sexual orientation, relationship status or any similar attribute. Yes of course, bad behaviour should result in sanctions including expulsion - but thats a completely different matter.
Umbrella organisations need to ACT and stamp out outdated , entitled, arrogant attitudes that were always wrong and can no longer be accepted.
Its also worth noting that, in a wider societal context, the truth is that club culture is in decline. Younger adults dont have the time, resources or inclination to ( metaphorically or actually ) wear a club tie and tolerate the same bores week after week. The naturism of the future will, I feel, be more informal, on public beaches / facilities. Younger generations are more liberal and less tolerant of edicts on etiquette and all the other bs and even though Im in my fifties I think theyre right!
The world needs more bare bodies and fewer busybodies!