New to Gay Lifestyle

I have been on nudist forums since high school and I have been to a couple of different campgrounds. However, it's only in the past year that I have started living a gay lifestyle. In that time, I have learned more about bears, otters, cubs, etc. It also truly differentiates nudism from sex for me. There are plenty of gay men I know who like seeing naked guys but only in a sexual situation.

How do you make sure that nudist events remain purely nudist events?

In my opinion, sex is a natural part of life (you can't procreate without it) but it doesn't mean that sex should happen anywhere and anytime.

I feel like I'm rambling but more wanting to start a conversation so I can learn more from others who aren't my partner about how things usually work or don't work.

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RE:New to Gay Lifestyle

Great topic. I love the fact that my gay brothers can feel sexually free when they want but I also believe it is important to understand boundaries. I've been nude in large groups of gay friends and, for the most part, nobody feels like that's an invitation to get frisky. I've had people inquire but when I tell them "no thanks" everyone's fine and we just continue on doing whatever we were doing. On some nude camping trips where it was all gay guys there have been some who pursue sex and most who don't. You just have to make your intentions known, I think, and people will respect it.

All that being said it's dumb to think that there isn't just a little bit of sexuality in hanging out with a bunch of naked guys. I really like it for purely practical reasons and also because, well, I'm hanging out with a bunch of naked dudes. I'm happily married and not looking to play around but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate an attractive naked man. I always say it's OK to look at the menu, just don't order an entree.

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RE:New to Gay Lifestyle

I have been on nudist forums since high school and I have been to a couple of different campgrounds. However, it's only in the past year that I have started living a gay lifestyle. In that time, I have learned more about bears, otters, cubs, etc. It also truly differentiates nudism from sex for me. There are plenty of gay men I know who like seeing naked guys but only in a sexual situation.How do you make sure that nudist events remain purely nudist events?In my opinion, sex is a natural part of life (you can't procreate without it) but it doesn't mean that sex should happen anywhere and anytime.I feel like I'm rambling but more wanting to start a conversation so I can learn more from others who aren't my partner about how things usually work or don't work.

Thanks for the post! I think it is important to realize that there isn't one gay lifestyle. "Gay lifestyle" is often a heteronormative term used to degrade gay men who have a culture unique to the straight world. Gay culture at is essence centers around gay males are sexually and romantically attracted to other males. As well, in gay culture, sex is quite commonly used to form social bonds (males have been doing this for thousands of years, look up the roman military). In my opinion, trying to eradicate this part of gay culture is also very heteronormative. Men get erections multiple times throughout the day, and seeing one often causes a chain reaction. It is biological, so why should straight cultural norms take precedence over a gay space? Trying to eliminate any bond between social nudism and sex is just another agenda point of assimilation politics.

Something more practical - here in AZ, gay nudists groups often have play rooms for people to go to for social sex. Then, sex won't distract from anyone having a meaningful conversation, for instance. Well, got to go to work. Have a good one.

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RE:New to Gay Lifestyle

I had the same thoughts the first time I went to a nude beach. Looking back I was worried about a lot of stuff back in those days. I think this might be different from what type of events or beaches you go to, but my experience is that, yes - someone might sit down next to you and flirt with you, and even suggest going into the woods, but if you are not giving any sexual signals back they will accept that.

Most people respect when you tell them that you are not looking for a hook up . I might be lucky that I am a big guy, and people generally dont want to mess with me if I tell them politely to go (naked or not) - but in my experience the last ten or so year, I dont think I experienced that people have not accepted a no. To be honest, I can can remember one time it happened with a very drunk guy that had a hard time taking no for an answer, but he calmed down as soon as the other people on the beach kindly told him to stop.

I have never experienced anyone having sex right in front of me at the beach. If you experience people have sex in front of you then ask them politely if they could be a bit more discrete. People who want to have sex if they get horny at nude events or at the beach tend to either go back to the hotel room (if it is nearby), or go to a somewhat private place (e.g. into the woods).

In the more private parts of the beach or in the woods behind the beach, sex happens. But I think it happens no matter if they are looking for "straight", "gay" or "lesbian" sex. I can not remember how many times I have walked into girl og girl sex or guy on girl sex in Maspalomas.

Be clear on your boundaries and enjoy being naked the way that is right for you, people will accept a no for a no.

This post was edited
RE:New to Gay Lifestyle

Great topic. I love the fact that my gay brothers can feel sexually free when they want but I also believe it is important to understand boundaries. I've been nude in large groups of gay friends and, for the most part, nobody feels like that's an invitation to get frisky. I've had people inquire but when I tell them "no thanks" everyone's fine and we just continue on doing whatever we were doing. On some nude camping trips where it was all gay guys there have been some who pursue sex and most who don't. You just have to make your intentions known, I think, and people will respect it.All that being said it's dumb to think that there isn't just a little bit of sexuality in hanging out with a bunch of naked guys. I really like it for purely practical reasons and also because, well, I'm hanging out with a bunch of naked dudes. I'm happily married and not looking to play around but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate an attractive naked man. I always say it's OK to look at the menu, just don't order an entree.

Very well written. Another thing I say is you can window shop, you just cant try on the clothes.

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