So I've been to a couple of nudist clubs before and even had some friends up until I met my current girlfriend, she early on wasn't totally against the idea but I never pursued it. Now flash forward many years later and I decided that I want to go back to the clubs in the area because I really did enjoy myself; plus a recent major health scare reminded me not going all this time and not doing something I truly enjoy wasn't the right thing for me (the short version).
I decided I wanted to visit valley view recreation club and I called them on yesterday with plans of going by myself today. I know or thought I knew my GF well enough and just assumed she flat wouldn't go or would be able to go and try it out. In the past she has gone from absolutely not when we something on TV to making critical comments and going into over thought tangents, so I was trying to avoid or take these issues into account. Instead she wants to wait a week and possibly go with, someplace clothing optional, and far away.
My concerns are still she will over think it, I don't know that distance is a good thing because a long car ride is just going to let her get nervous. She seemed to like going somewhere as far away as Michigan (we live in Wisconsin) so it would be an overnight stay, which seems like an overload to me. She also didn't seem to know that I wanted to go to a nudist club, like valley view, Sun ray hills, etc as I have no interest in the lifestyle places
So I guess my question is how do I convince and educate her on what nudism is and why I want to go even if it means she doesn't come with? I know not everyone can do this and honestly I think she is leaning towards the not more than the can, but I don't really think she gets what or why anyone does it?
I tried pointing her to AANR website and the clubs websites but I still don't think she gets it because even today she has her clothes on (when I suggested trying to spend some time naked at home)
I'm open to anyone thoughts?
If she's willing to go but wants to visit a place further away ... go with her!
Many times, women fear that they will run into someone they know if they visit a place like that, close to home. It may not make any sense, that she runs into someone she knows at a nudist place and they are there also, it's just something that they'd rather not deal with as they wrap their heads around going someplace and taking their clothes off in front of strangers ... and maybe that's what is okay with her ... doing it with people she doesn't know.
Here's the deal with me. My wife is and has been a nudist for almost 43 years! She enjoys being naked, visiting nude venues, making friends and wearing the bare minimum when possible. She likes wearing just a sundress and flip flops or sandals whenever we travel to other places. Example; we are getting ready to take a trip to visit nudist friends in Colorado. She went out and bought two new sundresses to wear for the drive. She can't ride naked so she does the next best thing ... wear the minimum. She'll go shopping, go out to dinner, visit with friends in public, do things in public dressed like this BUT ... will not do this here at home. It's bra and panties under those dresses. Her reasons ... "what if I see someone we know. They'll know I'm not wearing underwear!" It doesn't make sense to me but that's her and I go with it and I'm grateful she participates with everything else.
So ... let your GF dictate where and when to go. If she's willing ... you're 90% better off than 80% of the guys on this site! If she's willing to try nudism, social nudism ... consider yourself very lucky and let her decide when and where she'd want to do this ... or you could just do it alone ... always!
(Ugh. The editor here is terrible. I'll do my best to quote and reply.)
"Instead she wants to wait a week and possibly go with, someplace clothing optional, and far away."
"I don't know that distance is a good thing because a long car ride is just going to let her get nervous."
Or you could enjoy each other's company. Stop at some nice restaurants. Don't over think it yourself.
"She also didn't seem to know that I wanted to go to a nudist club, like valley view, Sun ray hills, etc as I have no interest in the lifestyle places."
Now you're losing me. Have you not discussed what you want to do on this visit? If not, that's on you to explain what to expect and to show her the websites - or print outs from the websites - of the place you plan to visit.
"how do I convince and educate her on what nudism is"
Print out or sit down with her and look at those pages. Don't just send her the links.
"I still don't think she gets it because even today she has her clothes on (when I suggested trying to spend some time naked at home)"
Don't be pushy. Some people don't like just hanging around the house naked but do enjoy swimming, lying in the sun, and enjoying nature.
From AndyDi: "Many times, women fear that they will run into someone they know if they visit a place like that, close to home."
And not just that. Someone may see them driving to or from the place, or ask where they went. Getting away makes it a special occasion and an adventure in a way that going to a local place would not.
Why not do both? Plan to go to the first place by your self and also schedule an outing to a distant place for both of you. Before you go to the place by yourself, let her know that she is welcome to accompany you. Who knows? She may say yes. Women are very unpredictable.
Personally I'd take this as a win that she is willing to go. As Andy said the majority of the guys here don't get that far. Additionally you can't push it, women banned to make the decision themselves in the manner and locale they are comfortable with. My wife has said she never would have gone if the first place was local. For us we were going on vacation in Jamaica and I asked if we could get a room on the clothing optional side of the resort and she agreed but she was not going to participate and I was not to bug her. A couple days into the trip she surprised me and others we had met by losing the swimsuit. But she did on her own on her own terms. Now she has no problem with it.
Let me say this, too. Your girlfriend probably doesn't think much
about nudity and "nudism" and "naturism" - and probably doesn't
want to. You have discovered a new philosophy, a way of thinking
about the human body with a whole host of beliefs. The "-ism" deals
with body acceptance, equality, de-sexualizing the body in a highly
pornographic culture, health, the benefits of sunlight, and on and
on. Your girlfriend probably doesn't care anything about all that.
Her boyfriend wants to get naked. Whatever. And wants her to get
naked, too - yeah, I'm sure he does; wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
If she's willing to participate under some set of conditions, go
with it and be thankful. Let all the rest come later - if it ever does. She may never care about the "-ism" part of nudity.
If she's willing to go but wants to visit a place further away ... go with her
Complete agreement here.
- I was already a long-time nudist when I started dating my current GF; I "came out" pretty early on in the relationship. I told her all about my experiences, being a family nudist in my previous life, and my personal philosophy on clothefree living.She listened, we discussed nudism, and she evenstarted going nude at home with me; but her response to social nudity was that it just wasn't for her (albeit in cruder terms.)
- She added that she would "contemplate" nudity while on a nice vacation overseas.
- Before someone exclaims "materialistic", it actually has little to do with a taste for high living. It's simply that she equates "cutting loose" with "romantic vacation" and "exotic", as in far away from home.
- Well, at least I now had an angle. And when it came time for us tochoose a vacation spot, I naturally picked St Martin. Was it the cheapest way to social nudity? No obviously. But then I had never been there and it's a place I'd always wanted to visit; and I'd heard Andy rave enough about Club O. to want to go check it out for myself. And I could "expose" my GF to social nudity there.
- Once there we agreed to go to Club O. She was unconvinced but wanted to make me happy so we headed out. We picked a spot, I went nude right away and she chose to go topless after a little while. We were surrounded by other nudists. Who were very social. Being her first time interacting with other nudists, she was initially taken aback. But then she gradually adjusted. We were far away from home, in a beautiful location where she could let go of her fears of "being caught." So she opening her mind to social nudity. We went skinny-dipping- she loved it. When it came time tohead back to our spot, she was comfortable enough to stay nude.
- Sometimes you have to put in a little extra effort and/or $$ to make it the best possible experience for your significant other. It will morethan likely pay off long-term.