RE:Quote of the day

I sleep better naked.... Why can't the flight attendant understand this?

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RE:Quote of the day

My wife just phoned to tell me that three women in her office have received flowers today and they are absolutely gorgeous. I said that's probably why.

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RE:Quote of the day

Did you know if you text Boss... Go fuck yourself...you don't have to go to work anymore.

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RE:Quote of the day

Did you know if you text Boss... Go fuck yourself...you don't have to go to work anymore.

It depends on who you text it to.

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RE:Quote of the day

I am not an early bird or a night owl I am some form of permanently exhausted pigeon.

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RE:Quote of the day

If you eat an entire cake without cutting it....you technically only had one piece.

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If you've ever found yourself in an argument about how you're not arguing..... you might be married.

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RE:Quote of the day

When a woman says correct me if I'm wrong... Do not under any, I mean any circumstances do it.

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Condoms do not guarantee safe sex, a friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.

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RE:Quote of the day

If you want your neighbors to build a privacy fence and save you the expense, start doing all of your yard work nude!

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