Naturism/nudity and sex/sexuality.
Hello everyone,
I am starting this topic because of some of the things I read in the MEN'S ROOM forum. I realise that some won't agree with me on this topic, and I welcome constructive comments from all of you. As human beings, we are all different. But a few things that are the same for everyone is sex (the act or thinking about it), sexuality (the part that makes us who we are), whether that be straight, gay, bi, or anything in between. Some people on here see more than they need to when questions are asked.
When any nudist/naturist visits a nude beach/resort/spa/camp ground etc. We are all going to see other naked people that we will like the look of, we are naked after all ! Now that does not mean that you are going to walk about with an erection or swollen labia, erect nipples etc. Sex and sexuality are part and parcel of all of us, more so in a nude setting as you are seeing that person at their most vulnerable, but also their most beautiful. You can not tell me that as men or women that you will not find someone sexually attractive in that setting, even if you are in a relationship with someone and you are there together.
Those of us that are more mature are able to keep control of certain parts of our anatomy (men), but that does not stop any of us from thinking about someone sexually, even in the naturist setting. Naturism/nudity is not some form of shrine based activity that means sex get's left at the front gate when you walk into the place.
If you deny nudity as not being a part of being a sexual person, then you are lying to yourself and humanity as a whole. As I see it from my point of view, sex/nudity are both part of naturism as a whole unit. A persons sexuality defines who they are as an individual. You can't deny that sex is not a part of being a naked human being. If that was the case then we should be devoid of all emotions and feelings. It's about whether or not you act on those feelings or just accept that they are there and part of you, the person.
I know that there are certain people on here that will not agree with anything I have said above and they are welcome to have their say.
I can't deny if I'm on a nudist beach for example they'll always be people who are more attractive to me than others and possibly if there was ever a chance might take things further/ chat if I was ever to meet them at a more appropriate time and place.
I think it's just how peoples behavior are towards it at the time. I wouldn't be offended if someone was showing some signs of arrousment - that's nature and will happen at times but just depends if someone was being too forward about it if that make makes sense
I can't deny if I'm on a nudist beach for example they'll always be people who are more attractive to me than others and possibly if there was ever a chance might take things further/ chat if I was ever to meet them at a more appropriate time and place.I think it's just how peoples behavior are towards it at the time. I wouldn't be offended if someone was showing some signs of arrousment - that's nature and will happen at times but just depends if someone was being too forward about it if that make makes sense
Yes it does make sense. I get what you mean.
I beg to differ. I think everyone is more attractive when naked. I have watched nudists get up and get dressed ready to leave the beach and thought how much older they look in clothes. But a person can be attractive to me for aesthetic reasons - the nude has inspired artists for centuries. And it/they inspire me in the same way. Regrettably I might find it difficult to take my eyes off someone who is particularly attractive. And, I guess, they could well suspect I am lusting after them.
Don't get me wrong. We are all sexual beings, whether nudist or textile. The vital thing is knowing the difference between nudity and sex, or porn. Each has its place and, yes, they can overlap. But if we confuse the two we will lose the ability to persuade the public at large about non-sexual nudity.
I think people-watching is something everyone does in public places. Why would it be any different if the other people are naked? Theres a difference between looking and staring. We might see another person, whether a random stranger or a friend /colleague we find attractive. That doesn't mean we are going to proposition them. We've evolved as self-aware beings and with that has come codes of conduct without which we wouldn't have survived as a self-aware species. Sadly, patriarchalism still thrives in many parts of society and that's where things get messy. I'm going as an observer to an education session for young men at a Catholic run residential university college in how to respect women tomorrow. I think it's astounding that such a thing is necessary in this day and age. But it seems that it is. Perhaps we should just send them all to a nudist place for a weekend. That might teach them about civilised behaviour more efficiently.
Seeing or thinking someone is sexually attractive is in the mind. Whether I'm clothed or nude it happens. Some people find more people sexually attractive than others do either clothed or nude. You bring up a good point that made me think. Of the people I have seen and found attractive while nude, would I have thought the same if we were clothed? As I think back on this I can say 100% that it wouldn't have mattered if we were clothed or not, I would have been attracted to them.In short, I guess I agree with you but I don't think finding someone sexually attractive has anything to do with being nude or not. At least in my life.
Seeing or thinking someone is attractive is also done through the eyes, not just the mind ! The mind of that person will add to the view it is looking at. I understand what you are saying, but my question was actually about when we are naked, not clothed. Although some people clothed can look attractive, as in how they display themselves (subconsciously or otherwise), will often make them appear more exciting/attractive.
I am basing my point on the basis of being naked (beach, resort, home etc). As I said, we are at our most vulnerable and beautiful when naked. So , although you base your answer on how you feel if that person is clothed or not, I asked in the context of the naturist/nudist point of view. Please don't think I am being rude with my above comment, that is not what I want.
It's about the fact that as human beings, we are also sexual beings, so attraction no matter whether your looking at someones face, body, legs or anything else when they are naked, sex does come into and is part of naturism as a whole unit. Yes, there is a fine line between sexual attraction and sex itself. I don't want this to become more than I have actually asked. So here goes. We as humans will find others sexually attractive, even more so in a setting where we are naked, because you will be seeing that person as a whole (nude). What I don't mean is a male sitting there with an erection and playing with it.
Some people think/feel that nudity/nudism and sex/sexuality are two different things, when they are not ! All these things make each of us a complete person. You cannot deny that sex/sexuality are not part of naturism. As an example, straight couple go to a nudist resort, enjoy their first day being naked with others, then go to bed. Now as a real couple, you are not telling me that they are not going to engage in sexual activity, whether that is in the privacy of their room or if they find a quiet/secluded outside location while at the resort (I don't mean exhibitionism or letting others watch them), we all know things happen and that one can get carried away with regards to passion etc.
People do not just go to a nudist resort and only engage in chat and have meals together then do nothing else ! People hug, shake hands, stand together for pictures, arms around each other etc (if you see my meaning). That in and of itself does not indicate anything sexual. Those that say you leave sexuality and sex at the front door of a resort are lying to themselves and everyone else.
My wife and I don't have a problem with the sexuallity that comes with being around other nude people. Of course we look and in our minds there are going to be sexual thoughts but that just enlightens our sex later on that day or night. To be honest also there are some that we might have not thought about in the same way if they had clothes on.
I don't think anybody is saying that it is OK for sexual behavior at a place but it is natural to have sexual thoughts. If some guy has an erection then so be it. If he starts to touch himself or other acts with it then that is where it becomes an issue. When wife and I are at the beach and I'm rubbing suntan lotion on her, are we in the wrong?
I don't think anybody is saying that it is OK for sexual behavior at a place but it is natural to have sexual thoughts. If some guy has an erection then so be it. If he starts to touch himself or other acts with it then that is where it becomes an issue. When wife and I are at the beach and I'm rubbing suntan lotion on her, are we in the wrong?
You got what I am saying.
These thoughts are perfectly normal and natural. As you state, it becomes an issue when someone decides to touch themselves in a sexual manner. As for you rubbing sun lotion on your wife's body, that would all depend on exactly how you were applying the lotion for someone to make an assumption that you were being sexual and not just rubbing the lotion in to protect her delicate skin. It's a matter of perspective.
'Nudism isn't about freedom, it's about lack of clothing. And lack of clothing doesn't mean lack of morals.'what a terrible statement to make - if naturism isn't about freedom then what is freedom? When i take my clothes off I am free, our society causes insecurities, persecution and guilt, naturism for me is a way out of this, it is also a chance to show I am safe to be around no matter what my body does. It is the open hand signal.Textiles talk about a fake image being a sexual a turn- on (clothes), naturists can talk about the actual person not the label they wear, that is liberated freedom.I agree with the last part on morals, but these are fixed no matter what you wear, they belong to the person. The guy masturbating on a beach in full view and watching those around him for stimulation is clearly demonstrating morals that most of us do not share. The guy who walks around the corner or hides is being socially responsible if he knows that doing something about it discreetly will prevent embarrassment to others - (sorry but in some circumstances and ages it just will not go away). The loving couple who get close and become engrossed with each other are not using the people around them. We have all been in love, sometimes the outside world does not exist, A point will come when they become aware again and it is what they do then that defines morals. I don't want a world where we state to our children that we cannot show love or be biologically functioning, I want them to understand it is what you do with it that makes you a safe person to be around, i want them be safe by understanding threatening human behaviour not hiding biology.The difference here is intent, and naturists seem to lump all sexual behaviour together. Our message should be; you do not exploit others for your own physical sexual satisfaction - we cannot control what people think, is the shady world of oppression.I am concerned about the messages we are giving to vulnerable and growing people, we state yep get naked it is liberating but at the same time stop being sexual, we are creating guilt and anxiety - why? Erections are normal so what, i wonder if women had them and not men would we have these debates? Telling people their body parts are not seen as sexual is crap and dangerous, they need to understand the signals of behaviour that will protect them whilst still being able to be receptive to desire and physical appreciation from those they want it from,Is is not time we took another road here, a mature, guilt free, track and stop tying to do the -we are not biological beings we are superior intellectuals, because that falls flat with even the slightest investigation. This site alone asks for sexual preferences in profiles, most pictures posted receive comments about the 'sexual organs' (actually they are the reproductive organs the mind is the sexual one) .Why can't we say, bodies are great, any size colour, deformity, some are physically attractive, what is the big deal here. this all gets so confusing and contradictory on naturist sites but seldom on textiles ones why? Because clothes hide the truth of course, but isn't that why we are naturists to be closer to the truth to remove this crap?Shouldn't naturist morals ethics or whatever you want to call them just state - we are not objects, we react, we look at something we are attracted to, we are curious - what we don't do is assume anything we would not assume if clothed.. In other words- we respect an individual's freedom as much as we respect our own while still being human.Before you slate me, i am not saying orgies on the beach, i am saying we are human beings, biological functioning animals, with forced double standards. put it another way; if you walk down the street and see drunks you avoid them, you take your kids away, but how many of you still drink with others and state it is social to do so. Do we really need to hide our sexuality to be social yet can do so many harmful things to our bodies in the name of being soc ail? Why are some naturists so prescriptive and defined on views on sex, is it really so unhealthy that we need to be textile lovers, hiding that part of us. - Arousal is not intimidating but the person can be, and that is what we need to work on in these debates. We need to empower and educate not dictate and censor. I would so love this thread to become a ; this is how we keep safe but be human discussion. then perhaps we can have a naturist code that works and is believable, so engaging textiles to drop their fearful attitudes. (nb i don't drink, neither do I get physically aroused in naturist situations any more than i would in textile ones).I actually do believe that naturism has the power to heal society's terrible views on women and children, but it won't until we openly talk about the actual threats not the perceived ones. Sex and Arousal can be as much an expression of love, vulnerability and respect as being naked with another human can be, it is a chance to show that you and not your biology are in control. Not acting on it empowers others, not needing to be ashamed of it empowers us all.
Well said.
It is a crass statement to make ! To me and countless others, naturism has always been about the freedom it gives you as a person, how it makes you feel about yourself, accepting yourself etc. It is societies view on those of us that love to be naked, that is the problem, the insecurities, persecution and guilt, that comes from what society thinks of our freedom to be naked. If they cannot handle the sight of their own naked body, that is and always will be, their problem.
His comment about a lack of clothes doesn't mean lack of morals. Morals are the knowledge and practice of what is right or wrong, regardless of the possible situation you may be in.
As you say, a guy masturbating on a beach in full view of everyone (men,women,children etc), is being Immoral, he is using that situation for his own selfish reasons. Most of us know the difference of being moral/immoral, so he can't put that statement on every male that is capable of being erect. I totally agree with you that, if a guy goes out of his way to hide an erection, then he is being morally responsible, and doing his best to avoid embarrassment to himself or others. Again, you are completely right in that owing to certain circumstances and age, sometimes, it won't go away. It does not state that that person is being overtly sexual because some people find it hard to control that part of themselves, it's something that is completely natural. As long as that person does their utmost to deal with/hide the problem, then their morals are intact and all credit should be given to that person.
Your comment about intent it so true ! I will never get or understand why some naturists throw all sexual behaviour together to come up with more than they need to. If a couple kiss and hold each other in a naturist environment, are they not just showing that they love each other, or are some people expecting them to suddenly get down to the nitty gritty right there and then ? You are so spot on that the naturist message should be that, exploitation of others is not acceptable for your own self gratification above the morality of others.
For younger women and men, yes, it is wonderful to state that being naked is freeing and liberating, but no one has the right to tell them to stop being sexual (that does not mean they are bonking at every given chance in front of others), but to respect that is it not acceptable in that particular environment. As others have said in this discussion, we are all sexual beings and that will not stop just because SOME people of a certain age think it should.
Technically, women do have a form of erection, as in engorged labia, not exactly the same as an erection in a man, but the comparison is there, if you think about it. One thing I have found over the years, the older some of us get, the more we are able to pick up on certain signals of behaviour, when one is younger and not as worldly in/of mind, it can take a bit of time to realise this and then be able to act on that knowledge and be respectful of others and the situation you are in. Then again, some people are just exhibitionists !
The amount of comments on this site alone about a persons sexual organs and how they look and how the person making the comment likes what they see completely contradicts what this site is supposed to be about, as is the amount of erection pictures I have seen on here too, which smacks to me as a case of double standards. Within our moral bounds, there is nothing at all wrong with complementing a person on how good they look naked, it's a compliment, not a sexual advance.
This next paragraph you wrote is perfect.
Shouldn't naturist morals ethics or whatever you want to call them just state - we are not objects, we react, we look at something we are attracted to, we are curious - what we don't do is assume anything we would not assume if clothed.. In other words- we respect an individual's freedom as much as we respect our own while still being human.
Some people on here could learn a thing or two from the paragraph above, because this gentleman is right in how he expresses that comment and how, as far as I am concerned we all should.
Again, your words are correct, "arousal is not intimidating, but the person can be". Empowerment and education are the right way to be, dictating and censoring is immoral, as you then make others feel bad about themselves and their bodies, negativity is a seriously bad feeling to have, especially when someone feels vulnerable.
Your comment that you don't get physically aroused in a naturist setting any more then you do in a textile one. I think that goes for most people, there are varying levels of arousal and not just the obvious ones that some people on here are trying to drag this down to.
A lot of threats are perceived, not actual !
Sex and Arousal can be as much an expression of love, vulnerability and respect as being naked with another human can be, it is a chance to show that you and not your biology are in control.
You Sir, are a breath of fresh air on this site, your above words to me, convey exactly what I wanted this discussion to be about.
First and foremost we are all human. For some nudism follows a close second and for others further down the list. As humans we are sexual beings who try to follow a set of ethics, morals and values and this doesn't change suddenly because we're nude. Some people believe sex has no place in nudism and some people believe body hair has no place in nudism. This doesn't make it so. We all follow our own individual moral codes and some choose to follow what they perceive to be the moral code of the group. Some might call this peer pressure.My moral code says that I should not cause harm to others. Some people would say they are harmed by public nudity. It doesn't mean nudism is wrong, just that there's a time and a place.IMHO, there's a time and place for sex and sexuality as long as it causes no harm to others.
Most peoples morals are set by their parents and there are others that we learn as we grow and mature. As you say, being naked, does not change those moral values.
This is my point. Where on this planet does sex/sexuality in the nudist/naturist setting not have a place, as these are part and parcel of every single one of us, they cannot be switched off because some people think/feel they don't exist in naturism, yet, so very obviously they are both there when you are stood naked with others chatting etc, just because you can't see them does not mean they are not there ! Body hair is also there for a reason, when do you think the human body produces it !
Not causing harm to others should be a given as far as morals are concerned, even more so within the naturist setting. Nudity in and of itself, is not breaking the law, but if you deliberately use nudity to offend others, such as flashing or waving your tackle about, then you are.
I am not advocating that people have sex or go waving their sexuality about in the nudist setting. What I am saying is that both are part of every human being, and like it or not, that is not going to change.
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