What happens when your child suddenly wants to cover up
I am asking this due to a son approaching 8yo. I have often pondered what advise or action I ought to undertake when and if such a moment occurs. If he has been raised nude, I would hope he would grow adolescence and remain a naturist. Would welcome others advice....just to prepare myself. No matter how much one thinks they are it never the less can come out of the blue.
I find that typically nudist children will want to start covering up when puberty begins. They start feeling awkward about their bodies because of all the changes that are happening that they themselves may have difficulty comprehending and accepting.
My best advice is to keep reassuring your son when that starts happening. Remind him that the changes are natural and that there's no need to be embarrassed. Make sure you're always open to talk to him if he does start to feel embarrassed about his changing body. Puberty is an awkward time for every growing child; just be there for him to help him through it.
That's a tough one...because there are so many other factors that come into play around puberty (school, peers, media) besides changing bodies.
Even though my daughter had been nude with her Mom and I pretty much since birth, and had been an enthusiastic social nudist since age 3: when puberty started hitting she grew increasingly self-conscious to the point where she was visibly uncomfortable with nudity. Which caught me off guard because it all happened so quickly and unexpectedly.
What should happen first is discussing it with your child. I did; and it was clear that she struggled at that point with not only being seen naked as her body was changing, but also with her increasing circle of friends finding out. I made the determination that it was better for her to quit nudism; even though it pained me.
But sometimes it's not even a problem; evidenced by the many teen nudists I've met/seen over the years. You just never know and you kinda have to just "go with it."
I was raised in a clothing optional home and might be able to help.
I was completely comfortable nude, and in fact preferred to be nude at and around home. On the rare occasions I participated in organized nude activities, I didn't think twice.
Then, along came high school.
I started to cover up. Why? Teasing and peer pressure. Actually, the teasing over my deep all-over tan might have started in jr. high in the gym showers, but it really kicked in when high school started. I was ruthlessly teased about it. I decided the way to stop the teasing was to either cover up or get some tan lines fast. Word was already out that I was a nudist, so tan lines wouldn't fool anyone, so I just started covering up all the time.
I started to discover that clothing didn't just hide my changing body, but clothing also dictated what social group accepted or rejected me, which peers would be my friend or my enemy, and even what music I thought was cool. Clothing began to form my persona.
Sometime toward the end of high school, I started to build some muscle and teasing was no longer an issue unless they wanted to get their teeth knocked out. Also about that same time, I started to miss my old self.
When college started, I pretty much went full blown nazi nudist. I was nude as often as possible. In the co-ed dorm area, showers were at the ends of the hallways, and not co-ed, but the sink areas were co-ed. I walked to/from the showers nude and just pretty much let everyone know I was a nudist and wasn't ashamed of it. Girls seemed to really dig this, for some reason. I made it perfectly clear that I was not interested in any physical relationships and that I was saving myself for marriage, but I was nude all the time. Since I was also studying to become an engineer, I ended up tutoring a lot of girls in subjects, and had as many as 3 girls in my dorm room at once. I was the only one nude, except for this one time. That's another story! The hippies thought I was cool. The conservatives thought I was doing it for religious reasons.
Anyway, after college, I felt somewhat empowered by being nude. I discovered that it wasn't a sign of sexuality, but more like a sign of humility and innocence. I began to see nudity in a much more healthy way. I also discovered that being nude is personal.
I turned out just fine (I think). I make really good money, completely debt-free, excellent marriage, and do a lot of volunteer work for my community. What else could you ask of someone?
We were spending a week end at a nudist resort.
My oldest son had recently turned 14.
Wife and I and other 3 sons exited our motor home. Oldest son said he would follow later. He had a book he wanted to finish reading. An hour later he was still in the motor home. I talked to him; he did not feel like going to the pool area. I went to the pool area. I told several teenagers about my son. Three nude teenaged boys and three nude teenaged girls went to the motor home, knocked and entered. Ten minutes later they all, including my son, exited the motor home laughing and joking. Never had a problem with him again. He eventually eased his younger brothers through that age period.
For me, it was also that I had a "clothing" phase, after I did very early and very intense naturist, I wanted to show me at puberty for a few years, not even at home. That has eventually settled again and the clothes were fixed away.
My son is 16 and glad to be naked again after a couple of years of covering up. He was never really shy, though more awkward about being naked. In middle school, he valued and copied what his friends did overall, but he seems to have outgrown it to return to being his own person.
At times when the boys are hungry, Ill get right out of the shower and make them pancakes as I air dry. One morning he complained to me that none of his friends' dads made pancakes naked. How he knows that isn't clear to me, but my experience is that dads don't care much about nudity, it's the moms that do. So I responded to him that his friends' dads probably don't care if anyone is naked, but listen to the moms who set the rules in the house. And in our house, moms don't set the rules. That seems to have helped because after a few months he was more casual about getting dressed coming out of the shower.
I let my sons be comfortable, naked or dressed. I don't want clothing or lack thereof to be an issue.
we were raised nude, and i for one couldnt wait to be old enough to say 'no i dont want to go this weekend'. i wanted to do the things my peers did, and to investigate and experience life with the rest of the world. i returned to nudism , with my wife, when our children were old enough that they didnt require us to be at home with them 24/7. did/would we include our children in the nude lifestyle? no. not a chance.
Are you a nudist dad? If you are a nudist dad then I think it will not a much problem to you. If you raised your son as nudist then he may also can get you nude. Just tell him that he is nothing to be ashamed about it. It is very much normal for men when he being grown up. Such as you .
I say let your child cover up. I also say if your child asks you to cover up you should as well. No matter how us as parents think we want things to work or go we need to respect all. I know I probably have no right to comment on this thread but I am anyway. Why shouldn't I comment? Because my husband and I decided not to raise our children in the lifestyle. We have our reasons but it was a decision we made. Just like my husband who wore a kilt all the time out in public decided to not wear one all the time when our daughter hit elementary school. Now he will wear it more, our daughter asks him to wear it. But he didn't want her to be made fun of, kids and adults are mean.
Children will go through different stages in their life and no matter how much they were naked or clothed. I have friends who decided to raise their children in the lifestyle and both their kids at different ages went through the I need to be covered up and also please put clothes on. It was a struggle for them but they came to me to talk about it and I said that you need to respect their wishes. They will either decide to go back or not.