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PMedvedOriginal Poster
Jun 20, 2012I was just reading the comments some folks wrote on a TN guy's profile. The guy with the photos happens to have a rather large endowment. More than one person wrote something along the lines of "you should be proud". To me, this kind of comment has no place on a nudist site. The nudist philosophy is that we should all be comfortable with our bodies and what we were doled out. Singling out certain guys for having a big one seems diminishing to those who don't. Also, why should someone be proud because they were born with a big penis? It's not an achievement, it's luck of the draw. Does anyone else have thoughts on this?
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- ST
Jun 20, 2012It's a fetish - like small feet or big breasts. Not universally shared, not equally common in all cultures / subcultures and in all eras. In our photo / image heavy culture, it's so pervasive as to seem "natural" - kinda like the entirely artificially muscled bodies that even the heavy laborers and Olympic athletes of yore did not have. I agree the comments are out of place on a nudist site, but more: the comments are pretty stupid, in any context - because theyassumea universally shared standard for what kind of body one should be proud of.
On a number of occasions I've been startled by people's reactions to old photos of shirtless guys in the early gay pride parades and events - vigorous, out, proud, courageous men, whose bodies then were seen as, well,embodyingthose virtues, and which are now laughed at. Too skinny, too pale, whatever. What a waste of potential happiness.ReactReply - MD
Feb 2, 2013I couldn't agree more with what the OP said. I think this is a problem in the population at large but especially in the gay culture. We have become obsessed with size, and quite frankly it ticks me off too. Supposedly the point of naturism is to take in the freedom and liberation of being nude and being accepting of everyone that at least respects their own body. Sadly many times it falls short of that though. The huge guys will have a parade behind them or people commenting on their "great" endowment. The smaller than average guys get commented on too, thankfully not to their faces. It really diminishes from the whole thing. I'm not surprised but still disappointed that it happens here as much as it does. I often wonder if calling it out would diminish or amplify the problem.ReactReply - PA
Feb 3, 2013Well from my point of view I have always preferred guy to have average normal sized equipment.. That is probably just me but those with the super sizes... I just don't find that attracts me to them.. A guy to me is a complete collection or attributes and parts not just a dick..
ReactReply - NA
Feb 4, 2013[quote]I was just reading the comments some folks wrote on a TN guy's profile. The guy with the photos happens to have a rather large endowment. More than one person wrote something along the lines of "you should be proud". To me, this kind of comment has no place on a nudist site. The nudist philosophy is that we should all be comfortable with our bodies and what we were doled out. Singling out certain guys for having a big one seems diminishing to those who don't. Also, why should someone be proud because they were born with a big penis? It's not an achievement, it's luck of the draw. Does anyone else have thoughts on this?
[/quote]As a short man I want to agree with you for I could never abide tall or big people who used it as a birthright to lord over others (often glorying in that which they did not create but were born with). However, as a nudist, though I connect with your premise, I do not agree with your position. Nudists should be some of the freest people around, a big part of that freedom is freedom to be candid, complimenting who and what we like. We all should (especially nudists) get over ourselves and not ever feel diminished just because another is complimented no matter what the compliment may be. Part of body acceptance is also accepting other points of view and perception and not feeling threatened all the time. I hang out with all body types, but that doesn't mean I check my personality at the door. If someone looks good, I tell them. Lastly the one thing NO nudist site should have is a bunch of declarations about what nudists should and shouldn't say, or for that matter what pictures should and shouldn't go up, something we freer minds put up with here. I believe too many prudish nudists are the reason we have trouble with attracting the next generation. They see our hypocracy. We cry FREEDOM but still insist on restricting it. If we are truly free enough to strip off our clothes, then let us truly be free to let other nudists be the type of nudist they are without fear of judgement or censorship.ReactReply - KE
Feb 4, 2013
I'm more of a live and let live guy. If you want to admire the large guys or the small ones, fine with me.
I can't really tell much from most pics anyway. If he's fully flaccid, it might still grow to be huge or might not. If he's semi in the pic, i can't tell if that's a big as it gets or if he just started to grow. So basically, I don't worry about it.
KCReactReply - PE
Feb 4, 2013Interesting topic about - size matters.
I am one of those that you are talking about. I have a large penis and gets many compliments about it. I think it's ok, but sometimes it's not about anything other than my big penis. It's like women with big breasts ...
When people write to me that I should be proud of my penis, It´s difficult to relate to, since I was born with it. But I think it's ok to praise other people if you think something on their body or face is beautiful.ReactReply - MU
Feb 4, 2013The idea that nudism suddenly makes you less human is absurd, and that seems to be what people are referring to when they use the excuse "but as nudists" to suggest that we are suddenly not supposed to find appeal in things that we normally do. Sexuality and sexual attraction is just as human as wanting general social interaction, and the idea that censorship is important in speech seems a bit bizarre. However, there are limits to any society whether named or unnamed. As much as there are people here that are probably thinking "fuck yeah, censorship and inhibiting yourself sucks" there are things that we all agree need to be held back... you know before the people going "but we don't use the bathroom in front of each other" start popping up with their argument that not all "normal" behavior is acceptable "group" behavior.
Ultimately to me, nudism is the great equalizer. It doesn't matter your status in life, how much money you make, who you know, what you do, everyone strips off and becomes essentially the same, and is at least on the same level. There are different ideas of what that should be, but as far as i'm concerned the whole concept of nudism is a very hippie sort of "live and let live" attitude. If someone isn't hurting you, then let it go. The question I ask of people opposed to this kind of talk is this: Is this question directed to you? If the answer is no, is it directed to someone you have a direct personal connection with e.g. a close friend or a relative? If the answer is no than is it in some way breaking an established law? If so far you're coming up with nothing but no... maybe you're the one with the problem. That being said, if the answer to any of those are yes, than speak up and make it clear that it's not appreciated, and if it continues find a way to separate yourself from the situation.ReactReply - STFeb 5, 2013Set a different context for a moment. You - or some imaginary straight guy - are at your hiking club's annual picnic, and there's a row of women in t-shirts sitting on a bench. You - or some imaginary guy - walk up to one of them and say, "Nice big boobs you've got." That's not cool for several reasons that apply to the situation cited by the OP:
1.) It's not that kind of party. If it were a kegger, maaaybe. What kind of party is TN? "Please keep the comments polite and PG rated. This is not a strip club, sexual comments will get you banned" pretty much nails it. The hostdoesget a vote in this, and this is neither repression nor censorship.
2.) Just because she's dressed so you canseethe size of her boobs doesn't mean she's inviting your attention. Should she wear a burqua? Likewise, just because a guy is naked does not mean he's all about his dick. The fundamental convention of nudism is not "let your inhibitions go." It's "We can take off our clothes and still conduct a normal social life."
3.) The message was delivered publicly, among her friends. They - so they will instantly note - do not "measure up." If it's a truly friendly gathering, such compliments should be delivered privately. Lots of folks on this site have plainly expressed that they are grappling with body issues. Yea, sure, they should just get over it.... but you're not them, you're you - are you being helpful, or rude?ReactReply - MEMemberFeb 5, 2013so well put, youngbimale. Well doneReactReply
- MEMemberFeb 5, 2013[quote]Seems here on this site more people that join are not really "nudists" as much as "exhibitionists." therefore you see more erections and more comments on penis size etc. as you said , size is the luck of te draw but it seems to be the focal point sometimes. Nothing wrong with admiration but we do need to keep comments to a minimum if we want to be respected in the nudist community. There are plenty of other websites that are meant for exhibitionism and erotic intentions.[/quote]I think this is well said and written! Stay naked!ReactReply
- LO
Feb 5, 2013I find the showing of sexual organs just for the sexual innuendo a bit stupid on a nudist site. Having said that, if this was a nudist site the administrators would eliminate those folks that do it. It is a nice site and I'm not saying change anything, but understand what it really is. The AANR it isn't.
Now having said that.... why are you reading other people comments about someone else's photo ? Sounds like a very boring activity to me. I read what people post on my photos, but the comments on the photos i find "offensive" I would never bother to read. I might even post on their photo "I find this offensive. Why post it here??
And thats all I have to say about that !ReactReply - SO
Feb 5, 2013Having been a nudist for long time now and visiting a lot of nude beaches, size of genitals is not something that I take much notice of, unless of course, it's extreme. The nude beach that i went to on St. Maartin in January, was full of guys that I did not know. I struck up conversations with many of them and had a great time, but I couldn't tell you who was bigger than anyone else.
ReactReply - NU
Feb 6, 2013size it doesn,t matter to me, we nudists should be proud to what we have.[cut/uncut,huge,small].ReactReply - MDFeb 6, 2013[quote]I believe too many prudish nudists are the reason we have trouble with attracting the next generation. They see our hypocracy. We cry FREEDOM but still insist on restricting it. If we are truly free enough to strip off our clothes, then let us truly be free to let other nudists be the type of nudist they are without fear of judgement or censorship.[/quote]
I think blurring the lines between sexuality and nudism is a bigger reason, at least in gay circles. I think that the induced body dysmorphia from our media and society is another reason. A lot that goes into that dysmorphia is size obsession, with penises for the guys and with breasts for the women. I don't see a problem with complementing someone by saying they have a nice looking something or another. I don't necessarily see a problem with pointing out that someone is disproportionately larger or smaller in some way (let's say the thickness of their arms for instance). Adding the value judgement I think is where things start going off the rails for me, and I don't see why calling that out is a bad thing.
The concept of enjoying naturism regardless of whether everyone has a porn body and endowments is the nice thing about the whole experience. Going around judging everyone based on those false metrics is the antithesis of that. Bringing up whether someone is largely endowed as a positive metric just continues to propagate the superficial BS that the rest of our society does. When discussing the human value of a person it seems as appropriate as bringing up the car they drive, the size of their house or the size of their checkbook. Bringing up these facts isn't the problem. Making it the basis for the value we apply to the person to receive positive judgement however is, in my opinion. Sure people are free to do that. I also think people should be free to call it out.ReactReply - TO
Jun 5, 2013There are a lot of good points made in this discussion, but one that has been over looked. Like many things, it is the thought that counts. The comments were meant as compliments. Being that this is a website and people are sharing photos, the photos will be commented on. I have personally complimented guys and everything from a hairy chest to a beautiful house. I get a number of comments on my piercings, they are on my penis, they are in photos... It is expected.
ReactReply - CG
Jun 8, 2013The question raises another question that no one has spoken. What is the reason that led us to register on the group 'Gay And Bi Male Nudists "? It's not the nudity as it is processed through the site universally, all sexual orientations and gender combined. This group aims to talk about things that are specific to us. This is not sport, it is not literature, or film, or etc.. This is our sexuality that we are attracted to other men and parts of our body.
When I read in the presentation of the group it concerns those "that want to Discuss That matters are of serious concern for gay and bi nudists", I wonder how to determine whether we are "seriously" gay, bi or nude?
It reminds me of a friend who, when we were contacted about a site, I had that I was not a real gay, since having been married to a woman. For him, he had to have known that men (biblically?).
Now, when someone saw my pictures, send me a compliment saying he finds me beautiful I replied that I thank him, but that beauty is subjective.
To return to the penis, I think, to parody a saying, it is sometimes better to avoid having eyes bigger than your stomach.
Claude
Sorry, but I'm French, I hope I have expressed my thoughts as accurately as possible! Thank you in advance for your understanding.ReactReply - VB
Jul 4, 2013Aside from a gargantuan elephant penis on a human man I'd say who cares? Big, small, thin, long, short, fat whatever it is it's just a penis. About 50% of the people in the world have 'em. But that's not what this discussion is really about. What I get from the original comment is the fact that someone would leave that as a comment on a picture. I get annoyed when someone leaves what I consider to be inappropriate comments on pictures. TN is not a hookup site and the people here should act like mature adults. That being said, there are a few on this site who come for the titillation of seeing naked people, don't know how to act, and post stupid things. I typically block those people. I'd much rather talk to someone who acts responsibility and with whom I may be able to develop a friendship with than someone who thinks it's cute to be crude.
ReactReply - CE
Aug 18, 2013Male, female, inbetween;
Black, brown, white, yellow, red;
Tall, short, fat, thin;
Hairy, bald;
Big bosomed, or not;
Hung or not;
Naked or clothed.
We are humans.
So let's get on with living together.ReactReply - QU
Sep 25, 2017i have to admit, it does annoy me when a guy with a big penis constantly brags about how big it is as if it's some kind of achievement. don,t get me wrong, no one is to blame for the size of their penis, and we should all be proud of what we have, whether big or small, but, in a size obsessed world, this can often make guys with a small penis feel inadequate. everyone knows that men see their penis in the same way as women see their breasts, it's always about size. i,m sure i'm not the only one who doesn't understand the need for large penis support groups, what is there to support? to each their own i guess, but personally, i'm not impressed with a large penis, i much prefer small ones.
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